Celebrating Artist & Upstarts
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Free Radicals
I still hate
fat people,
except
fat Elvis.

Okay, someone pointed out to me that I have
"fat Elvis" on my myspace page.  Fat Elvis is
still cool, okay?  Why?  BECAUSE OF THE
SEQUINS!!!!!!!!  Sequins make anyone cool.  
I was so in love with sequins that my goal in
life for five years was to become a Las Vegas
Showgirl so that I could wear the cool
sequined costumes.  Who cares if they are
cool sequined topless costumes.  The sequins
totally distract from the fact your boobs are
showing.

If a Walmart shopping, prozac popping, twinkie
stuffing bona-fide obese person wears
sequins....yes, it makes him cool.  I smirk
because I know it will never happen.












However, I truly believe in the power of
reflecting light!!!!  

Excuse me I have to stop so I can
continue gluing rhinestones on my cat.
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I am distracted by shiny objects,
so what?  
Would Dorothy have been cool
without her ruby slippers?  I think
not.  Where would Elton John be
if he wore Armani suits during
concerts?  

I am distracted by shiny objects, so what?  
Would Dorothy have been cool without her
ruby slippers?  I think not.  Where would Elton
John be if he wore Armani suits during
concerts?  

I hate fat people who are wider than their
shopping carts that stand in the middle of the
snack aisle at Walmart and take up the whole
aisle.  Have you noticed that Walmart aisles
are getting wider to accommodate the fat
shoppers?  These people wear shorts that a
family in Vietnam could make an entire
wardrobe from.  The t-shirts are made out of
my queen-sized sheets.  They never look in
the mirror and they DON'T WEAR SEQUINS!!!
 
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These people wear shorts that a
family in Vietnam could make an
entire wardrobe from.  The
t-shirts are made out of my
queen-sized sheets.  They never
look in the mirror and they DON'T
WEAR SEQUINS!!!  
Suzy Switters is a
Arizona Free Radical
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